Ask someone to accompany you to an event, or public happening, that has lots of other people around and lots of stuff to talk about. Sports events, outdoor concerts, state fair and the like are good. Plays, indoor concerts, art galleries are not so good.
Do not go out on a first date to a quiet meal where all you can do is focus on each other and try to think of things to talk about.
Get two tickets to an event, and then get a "backup" friend who will go with you if the "date" turns you down. Your friend will understand and will support you. You must tell the friend everything up front so no feelings are hurt.
Send a low-key email to the intended date, telling him that you have two tickets and that you would like for him to accompany you. Do not ask that you are "wondering if you would like to go with me." You tell him that YOU want HIM to go with YOU. ("I'd like for you to go with me because I think you would be really fun to go to [this event] with you.")
If he says no, get backup friend and go have a good time.
I love Rand's advice. Where were you when I was single Rand?
I also am a fan of the casual date. Assume they will say yes. Be confident and casual. Don't let too much ride on it.
My husband and I went to the State Fair together. It was super casual. So much so that I did not actually know it was a date. Something public and fun like that is the best.
WOW did Rand and my husband share notes on this? My hubby casually said, Oh I have tickets to this football game if you want to go and we took along his friend Josh too. He says it was a win-win... a win if it worked out( which clearly it did!) and a win if not-he still got to go to a football game with friends. Joy
Okay, okay. I believe you. Now, one might assume that I have someone to ask out. I don't. At least not as of this afternoon when I found out more details (a girlfriend). So, I shall store away the advice for future reference.
7 comments:
Ask someone to accompany you to an event, or public happening, that has lots of other people around and lots of stuff to talk about. Sports events, outdoor concerts, state fair and the like are good. Plays, indoor concerts, art galleries are not so good.
Do not go out on a first date to a quiet meal where all you can do is focus on each other and try to think of things to talk about.
Get two tickets to an event, and then get a "backup" friend who will go with you if the "date" turns you down. Your friend will understand and will support you. You must tell the friend everything up front so no feelings are hurt.
Send a low-key email to the intended date, telling him that you have two tickets and that you would like for him to accompany you. Do not ask that you are "wondering if you would like to go with me." You tell him that YOU want HIM to go with YOU. ("I'd like for you to go with me because I think you would be really fun to go to [this event] with you.")
If he says no, get backup friend and go have a good time.
I love Rand's advice. Where were you when I was single Rand?
I also am a fan of the casual date. Assume they will say yes. Be confident and casual. Don't let too much ride on it.
My husband and I went to the State Fair together. It was super casual. So much so that I did not actually know it was a date. Something public and fun like that is the best.
Good luck!
WOW did Rand and my husband share notes on this? My hubby casually said, Oh I have tickets to this football game if you want to go and we took along his friend Josh too. He says it was a win-win... a win if it worked out( which clearly it did!) and a win if not-he still got to go to a football game with friends. Joy
See, Becca? It's good advice!
Okay, okay. I believe you. Now, one might assume that I have someone to ask out. I don't. At least not as of this afternoon when I found out more details (a girlfriend). So, I shall store away the advice for future reference.
Maybe you should be the "Hitch" for women?
Kelly must have tried this strategy -- I didn't know we were dating for a few weeks when I forced him to say it quite bluntly.
Awesome! More success stories from the "we aren't dating, we are just going places together and enjoying it" school of matchmaking.
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